Liam Neeson Opens Up For the First Time About Natasha Richardson's Death

Feb 15th 2011 04:41PMEmail ThisNearly two years after his wife, Tony-winning actress Natasha Richardson, passed away following a skiing accident, Liam Neeson is opening up for the first time about that terrible night in March 2009.

"I walked into the emergency [room] -- it's like seventy, eighty people, broken arms, black eyes, all that -- and for the first time in years, nobody recognizes me," the 'Taken' star told Esquire. "Not the nurses. The patients. No one. And I've come all this way, and they won't let me see her. And I'm looking past them, starting to push -- I'm like, 'F**k, I know my wife's back there someplace.'"

Neeson rarely speaks about his private life, and was initially hesitant to talk about Richardson with Esquire writer Tom Chiarella. However, while recounting a motorcycle accident that put him in the hospital in 2000, the Oscar-nominated star of 'Schindler's List' began to discuss the tragic parallels between the accident he survived and the one that took the life of his wife.
After striking a deer, Neeson lost control of his motorcycle and crashed into a ditch, breaking his pelvis in two places. He was transferred to New York City's Lenox Hill Hospital, and Richardson, who was filming in Canada, rushed to be by his side. "I found out later they'd told her I wouldn't last the night," Neeson said. "Well, they never f**king told me that."

The scene would be repeated nine years later, only in reverse, with Neeson rushing from the Canadian set of the film 'Chloe' to be with Richardson, who had hit her head in a skiing accident.

After the fall, Richardson was initially lucid and simply asked to be taken back to her room, dismissing the ambulances that reported to the scene. Three hours later, however, the actress was taken to a small Canadian hospital after complaining of a headache. Within a few hours she was transferred to a larger hospital in Montreal. Neeson rushed from the set of 'Chloe' to be with Richardson, who had fallen into a coma as a result of a brain hemorrhage sustained during the fall.

The day after Richardson's accident, she was flown to Lenox Hill Hospital, where she died on March 18, 2009. On March 19, theater lights on Broadway and in London's West End were dimmed in honor of the respected actress and dedicated AIDS research activist.

"What am I gonna do? How am I going to get past the security?" Neeson told Chiarella, recounting what was going through his mind when he arrived at the hospital. "And I see two nurses, ladies, having a cigarette. I walk up, and luckily one of them recognizes me. And I'll tell you, I was so f**king grateful -- for the first time in I don't know how long -- to be recognized. And this one, she says, 'Go in that back door there.' She points me to it. 'Make a left. She's in a room there.' So I get there, just in time. And all these young doctors, who look all of eighteen years of age, they tell me the worst."

According to Chiarella, Neeson stopped the interview briefly while discussing Richardson, blinking back tears while gazing across the eatery at members of the late actress's extended family, who were coincidentally at the restaurant -- a favorite of Neeson and Richardson's -- the day of his interview with Esquire.

The actor returned to the set of 'Chloe' immediately after Richardson's funeral. "I just think I was still in a bit of shock," he said. "But it's kind of a no-brainer to go back to that work. It's a wee bit of a blur, but I know the tragedy hadn't just really smacked me yet."

Neeson and Richardson have two teenage sons, Michael and Daniel.

"I think I survived by running away some. Running away to work. Listen, I know how old I am and that I'm just a shoulder injury from losing roles like the one in 'Taken,'" the actor told Esquire. "So I stay with the training, I stay with the work. It's easy enough to plan jobs, to plan a lot of work. That's effective. But that's the weird thing about grief. You can't prepare for it. You think you're gonna cry and get it over with. You make those plans, but they never work."

Neeson's full interview is featured in Esquire's latest issue, on newsstands Feb. 22.

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